Logic
by Koko-chan1
Summary: Asazuki Kousuke giving a lecture.


Title: Logic

A/N: Just a little something that I scribbled when thinking about what life after the anime and manga would be. No real pairings, but a slight suggestion of Eyes/Kousuke/Ayumu if you squint reeeeaally hard.

"As we discussed yesterday, many people believe that logic is the main rule of civilization, and that every step of life should be planned out in precise logical designs. If this, then that. If one, then two. Two plus two will always equal four, the sun will always rise in the east and set in the west, and the cafeteria will always attempt to pass off the meatloaf as something edible."

There was a small wave of laughter at that, mixing with the tapping sound of chalk as he wrote. Professor Asazuki Kousuke smiled, glad that this year's students had a sense of humor. Last year, he'd horrified the kids by making silly comments. Why was it that those that studied Philosophy thought they had to be tightasses? It reminded him a little too much of his own childhood, really.

"However," he continued, turning to look at the neat rows of desks with the equally neat teenagers sitting behind them, "we all know for a fact that what works in theory or on paper tends to go out the window when people get mixed in. People are not logical, especially when stressed, frightened, or hopelessly in what they think to be love. After all, two plus two is hard to add when the mind goes 'Ooh, hot mama!' And don't look so smug, girls. It applies to you just as much as the boys. Girls just hide it a little better."

More laughter, and one or two thrown pieces of wadded up paper. He laughed and caught them, sticking his tongue out at the class.

"The issue here, of course, is that people believe they MUST be logical, even during those times I mentioned where logic just isn't part of our mental makeup. We get so hung up on how we think we're supposed to act that it becomes almost an obsession, the One True Rule of the universe."

"Like Equivalent Exchange?" asked one of the boys, raising his hand.

Kousuke raised an eyebrow, his green-gold eyes amused behind the yellow shades that drove the superintendant insane. "You've been into the manga again, I see. But yes, people get wrapped up in an ideal, and start to lose touch with the reality of it all. They forget that, to quote another little bit of pop literature, all your reality is what you have chosen. Logic is not always the answer. When you get emotional, your logic circuits turn off, leaving you to work on the basic instincts of fight, flight, and the oft-forgotten get drunk until you pass out." He looked around the room, grinning at them all and chosing a student at random for his next question, as was his right as the Evil Tyrannical Overlord. "Justine, can you name any other situations where logic might be more of a hinderance than a help?"

The girl squeaked, fumbling with the makeup compact and trying unsuccessfully to hide the fact that she'd been more intent on that than listening to the lecture. "Uh…um…what?"

More laughter, and the teacher shook his head. "Thank you, Justine, for the exellent example. Did everyone see that? The moment she was startled, her brain temporarily switched off, then switched on again too fast to really give an answer. Despite what we see on tv or in movies, this is how most people act to being startled. Logic really requires calm thinking and a lack of nasty surprises like a teacher catching you off guard. Of course, even when you have those situations, logic isn't always easy or possible. People are people, and we're just as capable of ignoring logic as we are of following it. I'm sure we've all encountered the scenario where logic would tell you to act one way, but honor or love dictate something else entirely. And let's not forget that society, that wonderful, logical, intelligent society, often applauds those that ignore logic and go do stupid things in the name of love and honor. After all, the world is built on the unexpected, and if there's one thing that being illogical does, it makes you very unpredictable."

Kousuke had to hold back a small laugh of his own as he said that, mostly because he knew at least two people who'd want to kick his ass for this entire lecture, and then strangle him for being right, especially about the unpredictability. After all, when he'd been seventeen, he'd cheerfully either discarded or warped logic to suit his own ends just for the fun of driving them insane.

The bell rang, and he raised his voice to carry over the sound of books being closed, chairs screeching across the floor, and footsteps. "Homework tonight is to write a one-page paper on your own definition of logic and how it fits into life. No book copying, I want _your_ opinions and reasons! And remember that we've got a test coming up next week. Anyone who gets an F has to take it over and also sing _I'm A Little Teapot_ in front of the whole class."

Groans followed his announcement, and the redhead chuckled as he watched the last of them file out. He looked at the clock, knowing that the superintendant had once again asked him to come to his office after classes were over. Logic would dictate that he go immediately to avoid the old man's wrath, but…

Well, he didn't feel like being logical today. He decided it was a great day for an ice cream sundae, and wandered out the door, humming to himself.

"Outside the window, kira kira kira li…"


End file.
